ain't no shame

"When's the big day?" "How much are you spending?"  "What does your dress look like?"

source

All true samples of questions I have received from acquaintances or co-workers or random people on the street (anyone else find it odd that when you become engaged, you immediately become fair game for personal questions of this nature?!).


I hesitate to answer each of them, for different reasons.  Number two seems pretty obvious- Idunoyou, why do you care what I'm droppin?- but number one I don't tell acquaintances and strangers because who knows what they can learn on the internet once they have my name and wedding date- I'm fraud security safe, yo.


The third one should not alarm a bride to be.  But this question  leads to others- where'd you get it (Oregon), when'd you get it (January), who was there? And that's where I hesitate because I've been on the receiving end of some pretty adverse reactions when I tell them who was with me when I chose my dress.


If your fiance helped you choose your gown, please stand up (please stand up).


I'm standing.  I mean, I didn't have a grand vision for my wedding day or for what I would look like before I got engaged.  I didn't know the difference between A-line or trumpet until I stepped into a bridal store.  On top of this grand lack of vision, I got itty bitty titties. No lie- I rock a 4.0 (A's baby!)  I had no idea what these grand white gowns would look like on my manly shape.  AND I suck at making decisions.  For hell's sake, it takes me ten minutes to choose my shampoo- I could only imagine how choosing a wedding dress would be.


So I brought my mom, dad... and my fiance Topher along.  These three were with me at my first dress outing, and my last.  I trust their opinions implicitly and they don't hesitate to tell me how they really feel.  Their thoughts were the deciding factors in my choice of gown- and I ain't got no shame in admitting that.  I love that Topher sucked in his breath when he saw me in THE dress.  I love that my mom let it slip how beautiful it was- before gauging my reaction-when she saw THE dress.  And I love that my dad took just as many pictures of THE dress as he had the whole time, knowing full well that he would love whatever I chose.


While I love all these things, in an initial meeting with a photography company, Topher and I explained how we'd be doing a first look because he had already seen the dress and these women's faces fell.to.the.floor.  Like I had destroyed their dreams of revealing the dress.  Whatevs.


I have love for women who keep their gown a secret- but I got mad props for women like me who love that their fiance was there to help choose it.


Does your fiance know what your day-of attire will be?  Did you know what you were looking for when you went dress shopping?